Do you reckon Jesus would have used AdBlock to allow Internet browsing unhindered by popups and the temptations of capital? Adverts, after all, are nothing but an invitation to covet.

Well, I’m not at all sure Jesus would spend much time online. I know the Internet seems like the be-all-and-end-all of human lives in the covid age, but Jesus, who never wrote a gospel of his own, and whose favourite occupation seemed to be a shared meal, might be far more into face-to-face communication, abiding in one another’s company. On the other hand, he also spoke to large crowds, and the Internet would be ideal for that.

I cannot say. But people often advise me to use AdBlock to speed the loading of socials and YouTube videos and keep from distraction - and I’ll be honest, I am easily led by the right advert at the right time. But at the same time, I feel like adverts for many sites are the cost of entry. Google, YouTube, Twitter and Facebook provide incredible services, human connection, communication and entertainment, and the only cost of entry is to see a couple of adverts — that and have my cookies munched. If I take the service without paying the easy fee, it feels like theft, albeit theft in an abstract way, and from some of the biggest and worst corporations. But I’m not convinced that taking from the rich and the bad is as morally neutral as I’d like it to be. Robin Hood didn’t just take what satisfied him and relish it.

I guess the equivalent would be disciples slipping into the Roman games without buying a ticket - assuming ‘the Roman games’ is a thing that existed and worked on a ticketing system. The big difference there is going against Roman law, you’re liable to be stabbed in the torso. Blocking ads on YouTube, I’m not sure it’s actually against any laws, but it feels against the spirit of the law, which is the part that matters.

Jesus said to give unto Caesar what is Caesars - to pay taxes, since the coins had Caesar’s head on, and thus belonged to Caesar - but balanced this with giving unto God that which is God’s — which is everything in the universe. I’m pro paying taxes, so I won’t dispute that here. The other comparison you might give is the turning of the tables in the temple. Is tuning into YouTube to watch something wholesome like a sermon or Bob Ross or a Steamed Hams compilation, and having to watch an advert ahead of it for Grammarly or some new kicks, something Christ would find an affront? I really don’t think he had a sharp anger, and compared to the money-changers in the temple, who were making mammon and capital an obstacle to the holy temple, the very house of God, seems to go far further than that.

I will resist AdBlock. Resist is actually the wrong word: I don’t really want to use it, so there is little temptation, and no resistance needed. I would not be satisfied or comfortable. I think people can certainly go either way on this without needing any more salvation than I do: to evade the ads while believing it is perfectly reasonable is perfectly reasonable, but for me to evade them while suspecting I was doing something wrong would be doing something wrong — and it is easier for me to pay a moment of attention to Hello Fresh or Sony Pictures UK, than to sing for my supper.

Would Jesus use AdBlock? Well, ‘would Jesus do such and such a thing?’ is often a question worth asking, but putting Jesus in hypotheticals can turn into fan fiction that runs very much on the lines of our own culture and assumptions. Jesus in ‘Ben-Hur’ - a literal Bible fanfic novel - appears only rarely, says nothing, gives of himself, and does nothing that Lew Wallace had to guess at or make up. Would Jesus use AdBlock? Well, would Jesus use lip-balm, dear reader? Would he use a shower or a bath? Who can say. Would he play Among Us? Would he play Cards Against Humanity? And if so, could he ever hope to win a round? I don’t know! Dear reader, I do not know.